Early Parenting : Articles : It's All In Your Head

It's all in your head

Carrie, you ask, what is my bliss? That’s a really good question and one I think can sometimes make people groan with how simplistic it sounds. I think it is that simple though and I think the misconception of it is because often the term bliss is viewed as a thing or a place when really, I think bliss is more of a mindset. The dictionary definition of bliss is: supreme happiness, utter joy or contentment. With that definition really anything we do can be our bliss as long as we choose to receive it or approach it with a certain joyfulness. And it really is just that: a choice.

The actual things that bring me joy seem to change constantly. Sometimes it’s writing, sometimes it’s laying in the yard reading while my kids play all around me, other times it’s rolling in the dirt with my kids. Sometimes it’s being alone with my husband or sewing or walking or any number of solo pursuits and sometimes still it’s being in the middle of a chaotic, crowded house. Sometimes it’s even getting all the socks and toys and STUFF picked up around our house or scrubbing the bathroom floor.

In order that I can find my bliss in whatever it is I have to do or choose to do, even if that thing is cleaning the bathroom floor, I find the setting of intentions to be a really useful tool. For me intentions are not a to-do list but rather a decision, made ahead of time, to approach or receive things in a certain way, with a certain attitude. I know that some folks choose a new intention for each and every day, and sometimes I do too – heck sometimes I have to choose a new one for each hour or minute even! Especially when the task ahead is less than exciting. Mostly though I find it really helpful for me to keep an intention for several days in a row until it actually becomes a part of who I am.

Right now, and for the past week or so, my intention has been, “I will meet each person where they are and with that in mind I will intend to meet them with compassion.” This goes for my children, partner, friends, the store clerk, heck, even myself! Because I just might need a little self-compassion when faced with the mess that four children can make.

Once my intention just becomes a part of me, I’ll know that I know. Sometimes it takes a conscious shift to create a new intention and other times the way I know is because another intention starts to present itself. With the setting of intentions as a daily practice, it really becomes easier and more clear about what I need to do to keep my mind on track with a state of bliss.

Now, I’m not saying I don’t sometimes lose it or wig out about the amount of chaos or mess or work that is all around me but I do know that with my clear intention set and mindfully kept, I can catch myself and bring myself to shift my perception or reception of the scene at hand a lot faster these days than I used to. But I guess that’s part of my bliss too. Knowing that each experience, each freak out, mess up or mishap is the chance to learn something about exactly how I’m approaching my time here on this earth. And mostly what I am doing is trying to live in the bliss and joy and contentment of it all.

In fact it may be time to move onto a new intention of making sure I really am seeing the beauty, the joy and the contentment in it all. It all has to be done anyway, why not do it from a blissful place? It’s that shift that can sometimes be difficult though, don’t you think?

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